Tuesday, January 14, 2014

As Long As You Look Good

Because I was supposed to move almost 2,000 miles away this summer, when I told my Cardiologist that I was leaving when last I saw her in June, she gave me all my files, wished me well, and sent me on my way telling me to find another doctor in Texas as soon as I could. Well the move didn't happen and when Venus died I kind of freaked out and realized I needed to get back to see someone. So I called to set up an appointment with the doctor I had up here in October and was just able to get in to see her last week.

Any other physician and I would have probably tried to find someone who could see me sooner. By the time I got in to see her it would be seven months since I'd had a check up and I'm supposed to go every three to four months. But I really like my doctor. She's thorough and really went to bat for me when I needed some medical back-up. So I waited until January and then went to my appointment so I could wait a couple of hours in the waiting room. Not only is she hard to get in to see but she is NEVER on time. But again, she's a doctor worth waiting for. And the waiting room is always filled with chatty people. This particular visit was no different.

As it would turn out two different couples, both at least in their seventies, came in for two separate appointments. They sat across from each other and started chatting about old age and how it's no fun, then of course the wait time. But then something happened. The wife of one couple said to the other, "You know, you look awfully familiar." Well it didn't take long for all four of them to realize they had all once been a part of a group of very best friends. They used to go out dancing and having fun, and they hadn't seen each other in at least thirty years! It was the coolest thing to watch and hear, the sharing of memories and remembering fond times. Of course talk eventually turned to who was still alive and who wasn't, but even that was special to see. Each person had fond memories attached to them and there was so much history to share.

Conversation traveled to how, now that they were older, there was less and less interaction with the outside world and friends among both couples. One of them mentioned perhaps going to brunch at the Elk's Club, and then snickering and chatter about the club followed. One woman said there was a man who went to her church who used to be part of the club and has now had a sudden "turn around" and much gossip was shared on the double life of this friend. Then the other woman, at the conclusion of that particular topic, said, "Well, as long as we look good, right?" and my heart kind of broke.

How many of us think like that, Christians especially? As long as we look good it doesn't matter what thoughts go through or head or what we do in our secret lives. As long as we show up every Sunday, drop something in the offering basket, sing when we need to sing and pray when we have to, it's all good. But nothing could be farther from the truth.

It's easy enough to say we believe in God and to look like we're following His ways but that is a dangerous way to live. Your outside will be lovely but your inside is filled with turmoil, lies, hurt, anger, all the things you want to keep hidden. And slowly but surely you begin to rot from the inside out. It won't take long before your outsides match your insides, and then...well that's just going to be a mess that no one wants to clean up.

I find myself slipping into that state of mind from time to time. Trust me, I am no angel. I do go to church every Sunday, attend small group, pray, do all the things "good Christians" are supposed to do but there lies a bitter seed in my soul. It lies within even the most pious and devout of us. If we don't stop to take inventory and truly invest in ourselves as well as each other then we're just among those waiting to rot.

Whatever walk you're walking, own it. If not to be honest with those around you then simply to be genuine with at least yourself. Don't go to church because you feel like it's something to check off your to-do list, do it because you want to be there. God doesn't want lukewarm believers. He wants you on fire for him or He wants you to take a step back until you're ready to be on fire for Him. Give because you want to give whether it be money, time, love. We are not employees of Christ, but meant to be his living examples. Let everything you do mirror the love of the Father. He is never anything but genuine. We need to do the same or eventually our outsides will catch up with our insides.

On another note I will definitely be doing a review of "Frozen" soon. I'm going to be seeing it again tonight and will be a bit more critical so I'm not just oozing, "OMG SQUEEEE!" fangirl moments. But until then, bask in Else's fabulousness.


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