Friday, January 28, 2011

Diana Reads X-Men: Chapter Seven

I have learned a lesson. New scene does not necessarily equal terrible scene.

Xavier has decided to give Logan a tour after telling Logan he only has to stay for 48 hours. My thoughts, since it doesn’t really say why, are that the professor is trying to show Logan all he could be part of if he stays there. Logan is quite impressed, especially with the Blackbird (which they haven’t actually said the real official name yet), but not impressed enough to want to stay.

While they’re in the hangar, Xavier shares a bit about how he came into his powers. Someone tell me if this is comic canon, or if it was just invented for the movie?

“‘When I was fifteen years old,’ the professor said, ‘I began to hear other people’s thoughts. At first I thought I was going mad. One day I read the mind of one of my teachers and saw that he was going to fail me, simply because he didn’t like me.’

‘I bet that pissed you off.’ Logan said.

‘It did at that,’ the professor commented. ‘I was so mad that I put a suggestion in his mind that was was having a heart attack. He nearly died.’”

He then goes on to explain how he met Eric around the time he was feeling alone. It doesn’t say how they met, which is disappointing to me, but that they formed a fast friendship. As the years went by and more mutants came into their power, the world changed and so did Eric. The professor and he no longer saw eye to eye on things, and Eric began calling himself Magneto. As a counter-measure, Xavier opened his school.

Done with the tour, Xavier informs Logan that Jean wants to examine him. To which I have no comment.

We move now to Senator Kelly and his Helicopter of Luxury. It’s so ab fab that he can barely hear the blades slicing through the air just over his head. Ah, how real life would be so much better with one of these.

Being the super important awesome man made of spectacular that he is, Senator Kelly has just gotten off the phone with the president. Of the entire county. That’s right, you should be impressed. Except, why is his aide looking like he wants to punch puppies? He should be glad the president agrees that mutants are a nuisance and should be gathered and…now why is his skin turning bl…why does he have boobs?!

It finally hits Kelly, literally, since Mystique puts a quick smackdown on him, that his aide is not really his aide, but a woman covered in blue scales and weird yellow cateye contacts. The senator calls for help from the pilot, who turns out to be Toad, and realizes he is now aboard the S.S. Failship.

After this sad realization, Mystique stomps on his face and knocks him out.

Somehow I don’t think he’s going to wake up at home, on the couch in his favorite Snuggie.

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